- Make race car noises when anyone gets on or off.
- Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers.
- Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!"
- Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.
- Sell Girl Scout cookies.
- On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.
- Shave.
- Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"
- Offer name tags to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.
- Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
- When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they open by themselves.
- Lean over to another passenger and whisper: "Noogie patrol coming!"
- Greet everyone getting on the elevator with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral.
- One word: Flatulence!
- On the highest floor, hold the door open and demand that it stay open until you hear the penny you dropped down the shaft go "plink" at the bottom.
- Do Tai Chi exercises.
- Stare, grinning, at another passenger for a while, and then announce: "I've got new socks on!"
- When at least 8 people have boarded, moan from the back: "Oh, not now, damn motion sickness!"
- Give religious tracts to each passenger.
- Meow occasionally.
- Bet the other passengers you can fit a quarter in your nose.
- Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!"
- Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected.
- Sing "Mary had a little lamb" while continually pushing buttons.
- Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the elevator descends.
- Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side.
- Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the elevator.
- Burp, and then say "mmmm...tasty!"
- Leave a box between the doors.
- Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it.
- Start a sing-along.
- When the elevator is silent, look around and ask "is that your beeper?"
- Shadow box.
- Say "Ding!" at each floor.
- Lean against the button panel.
- Say "I wonder what all these do" and push the red buttons.
- Listen to the elevator walls with a stethoscope.
- Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space."
- Bring a chair along.
- Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?"
- Blow spit bubbles.
- Pull your gum out of your mouth in long strings.
- Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body."
- Carry a blanket and clutch it protectively.
- Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
- Wear "X-Ray Specs" and leer suggestively at the passengers.
- Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger."
- If anyone brushes against you, recoil and holler "Bad touch!"
- Bring a water pistol. Soak everyone's shoes.
- Start brushing off invisible bugs from your arms, screaming "Aaughh! Get them off!"
- Challenge your neighbor to a "Tic-Tac-Toe" tournament.
- Laugh hysterically for five seconds, stop, and glare at the other passengers like they are crazy.
- Charge into the elevator dripping wet, holding a towel and wearing only a bath robe. Mutter something about how husbands/wives always come home early just when it's getting to the good part.
- Make chalk drawings on the walls.
- As the elevator is going up, jump violently up and down, shouting "Down! I said down, dammit!"
- Crouch in one corner and growl menacingly at everyone who gets on.
- Try to get a game of "Twister" going.
- Wrinkle your nose and smell the air repeatedly. Sniff at your neighbor suspiciously, give a disgusted frown, and take a step away.
- Find a crowded elevator and pace back and forth inside it.
- Walk in, face the back and go about two inches from the back wall.
- Walk in, and start reciting a shopping list in monotone.
- Stand right in front of the doors when waiting to get on. (This gets a good reaction from the people inside.)
- Once inside, stand right in front of the doors, waiting to get out. (This gets a good reaction from the people waiting to get on)
- Wait til the door is almost closed then pry the doors apart with a painful expression on your face.
- Sing anything by Guns 'n' Hosers while pantomiming the lyrics. (I love her but I had to kill her, would be good)
- Ask, "Did you feel that?"
- Look at the ground while standing in the corner and moan softly.
- When the doors close, look at the person next to you and yell, "Your nostrils they're like wind tunnels, SUCKING UP ALL MY AIR!" Then scream and collapse, when the doors open, get up and calmly walk out.
- Comment one by one, on the clothing of all the people riding in the elevator.
- Push the emergency stop button and say "Now it's time for you all to DIE! Just kidding." restart the elevator.
- Wander from corner to corner of the elevator during the course of the journey.
- Hit every floor button, and at each floor get out and say, "Nope, this ain't the right one." Get back on and ride to the next floor. Repeat.
- Explain to some poor innocent stranger all about the complex dental work you supposedly received. Get them to look in your mouth and everything.
- Tell some poor sod your complete life history completely out of the blue.
- Ask for advice on a completely disgusting problem.
- Get a vote from the entire elevator about some completely pointless issue.
- Say, "Omigod, did you hear that?" And look completely panicked while not uttering a single intelligible word.
- Sit in the corner and meditate. "Ohm."
- Pick up the emergency phone and try to order pizza.
- Run like hell while the security guards try to find you to kick you out. (This can be applied to all)
- Wear an earphone with the cord inside your jacket, carry a walkie-talkie. Once inside the elevator, stop it and say. "Williams FBI, I need to see some ID. Look at everybody's ID restart the elevator and talk into your walkie-talkie saying, "It's ok he's not on this one. But we think he did manage to find bullets for his gun."
- Say to an older lady "My you've got nice hair." Pull out a pair of scissors and look suggestively at her.
- In a foreign accent say "You are very beautiful." to a young girl. Pull out some money and say "How much to purchase you?". Indian accents work well for this, like the guy on Short Circuit.
- Do all of these things with a friend, while both of you are wearing trench coats and dark glasses.
- When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
- Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
- Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exits with the passengers.
- Ask if you can push the button for other people, but push the wrong ones.
- Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor you're on
- Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After awhile, let the doors close and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"
- Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
- Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
- Move your desk in to the elevator and whenever someone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.
- Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on ask them if they hear something ticking.
- When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
- Swat at flies that don't exist
- Tell people that you can see their aura.
- Call out, "group hug!", then enforce it.
- Talk in to your cell phone as you enter on the ground floor press floor 5 and when the door closes, in a shock voice say "what do you me theres a gun man on the fifth floor?"
Saturday, October 16, 2010
99 Fun Things to Do in an Elevator. :D
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4:34 PM
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